wanderingkhunphu

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2007-11-11T17:28:00.000+07:00

THIS BLOG IS VIRTUALLY CLOSED, YOU CAN READ MORE AND NEW THOUGHTS CLICKING ON SAINAM FOUNDATION'S WEB SITE.

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MANY THANKS, WILL WAIT FOR YOU THERE!

THE GREY AREA

2006-08-08T20:28:00.000+07:00

… and here they come, these days they come.

These days when you wake up feeling sad without any apparent reason, when you don’t like the sun, neither the blue sky, the clouds or the rain and everything bothers you.
These days, when you feel like suffocating under a mantle of indefinite melancholia and still you don't understand the reason of all of this.
These days when you would like to push the famous self-destruction’s button, once again without any reason because nothing has changed since yesterday when everything seemed perfect.

These days when you read what you did write a week before and you feel such a perfect idiot and a fool.
You can not bear to see such an amount of crap about peace, love and understanding, like in those pseudo “new age manuals” for beginners.
And you ask yourself: "Who do hell do you think you are?"

These days that come without a warning, without knockin’ at the door, that stay for a while and then they go… always leaving a definite mark.

And I wonder why of all this?
Why these moments are hitting me so much?
Where are the famous detachment and acceptance I’ve been constantly talking about?

Only one thing is clear to me. Even though I am aware that life is a grey area yet I am living as though there is just a black or white area.

I still see life as made only of two clearly and separate sectors when instead, inside myself, I perfectly know that it is everything different... but knowing this doesn't help me if I am unable to live according to this truth.

Yes, the path toward acceptance is hard and difficult, most of all for someone like me, someone who knows he is living in a grey area but yet he is able to see black and white only!

ANYWAY, PEACE LOVE & REVOLUTION ... FOREVER.

Planet Earth, where time is only illusion

© – Copyright Claudio Romano

Speachless Part II

2006-05-20T20:12:00.000+07:00

COPIED & PASTED FROM : www.digitalspy.co.uk/article/ds33189.html

Naomi Campbell throws £1m birthday bash

Thursday, May 18 2006, 12:48 BST - by Matthew Houghton
Naomi Campbell will celebrate her 36th birthday with a £1 million party in Dubai.The three-day party will take place in the seven-star Burj Al Arab hotel and Naomi will hire out all 18 floors.The celebrations are set to begin on Sunday and each day will have a different theme. Sunday will be 'All White', Monday (Noami's actual birthday) will be 'Hip-Hop' and Tuesday is 'Brazilian Samba'.Among the A-list guest to attend the party are David and Victoria Beckham and fellow supermodels Eva Herzigova and Linda Evangelista.

And now may someone explain to me how I can avoid to get angry and totally pissed off when I have to read such kind of news, knowing what is happening out there, in the real world.

Just I wish that the food they are going to swallow would be poisoned and that everyone of them will suffer from heavy diarrhoea, so that all these people may get an inch of awareness (even if for just 1/1000) of what kind of sufferance and pain have to go through so many children all over the world, for the lack of basic cares, water and food.

So, with all my heart, I just would like to say all these people my heartfelt wishes with those simple words…. FUCK OFF, YOU ASSHOLES!

Peace, love and revolution.

Planet Earth, May 20th, 2006

SPEACHLESS

2006-04-23T14:11:00.000+07:00

Cheney and Halliburton Hold Title - Top Earners In Iraq

By Evelyn Pringle
There has never been an investigation into Cheney's involvement in awarding Halliburton no-bid contracts making the company the number one war profiteerer in Iraq. Apparently people have forgotten about the March 5, 2003 e-mail between the Army Corps of Engineers and a Pentagon employee that stated the contract "has been coordinated w VP's office."
People also seem to have forgotten that Cheney continues to own stock in Halliburton. Stock that has risen in leaps and bounds since its former CEO moved into the White House and developed the most prolific war profiteering scheme of all time.
http://www.scoop.co.nz/stories/HL0603/S00448.htm

Paris loses her favourite ride
9.15AM, Thu Apr 20 2006

Paris Hilton has been banned from the family casino after losing her £100,000 Bentley in a poker game.
The hotel heiress has been barred from the Las Vegas casino by parents Rick and Kathy Hilton, who are worried that she will squander her fortune.
http://www.itv.com/news/1956608.html

THE RICHEST PEOPLE IN THE FUCKING WORLD:
1 William Gates III , USA, 50.0 billion US$
2 Warren Buffett USA, 42.0
3 Carlos Slim Helu Mexico, 30.0
4 Ingvar Kamprad Sweden, 28.0
5 Lakshmi Mittal India 23.5
6 Paul Allen United States, 22.0
7 Bernard Arnault France, 21.5
8 Prince Alwaleed Bin Talal Alsaud Saudi Arabia, 20.0
9 Kenneth Thomson & family Canada, 19.6
10 Li Ka-shing Hong Kong, 18.8
11 Roman Abramovich Russia, 18.2
12 Michael Dell USA, 17.1 www.forbes.com

AND I AM REALLY LEFT SPEACHLESS

PEACE, LOVE AND REVOLUTION

Fucked up Planeth Earch, April 23rd, 2549

CALL IT DEMOCRACY

2006-04-20T16:53:00.000+07:00

“Call It Democracy” a song by BRUCE COCKBURN

Padded with power here they come

International loan sharks backed by the guns

Of market hungry military profiteers

Whose word is a swamp and whose brow is smeared

With the blood of the poor

Who rob life of its quality

Who render rage a necessity

By turning countries into labour camps

Modern slavers in drag as champions of freedom

Sinister cynical instrument

Who makes the gun into a sacrament-

The only response to the deification

Of tyranny by so-called "developed" nations'

Idolatry of ideology

North South East West

Kill the best and buy the rest

It's just spend a buck to make a buck

You don't really give a flying fuck

About the people in misery

IMF dirty MF

Takes away everything it can get

Always making certain that there's one thing left

Keep them on the hook with insupportable debt

See the paid-off local bottom feeders

Passing themselves off as leaders

Kiss the ladies shake hands with the fellows

Open for business like a cheap bordello

And they call it democracy

See the loaded eyes of the children too

Trying to make the best of it the way kids do

One day you're going to rise from your habitual feast

To find yourself staring down the throat of the beast

They call the revolution

IMF dirty MF

Takes away everything it can get

Always making certain that there's one thing left

Keep them on the hook with insupportable debt

... AND I WONDER

2006-04-05T10:16:00.000+07:00

Passing through the poor villages of Laos, Thailand, India and Cambodia I had the chance to see so many skinny children playing around those dusty roads and paths.
Some running after an old bicycle tyre, others playing football with a makeshift ball, other trying to learn the art of Thai boxing and so many running barefoot in the fields or swimming in a pond.
All of them shouting, screaming, laughing and sharing happiness.
Common western perception would make us think:
“Poor kids they do not have anything, yet they are still happy with nothing!”

Now I am here in a Bangkok internet shop, crowded with many fat kids the same age as the ones described before playing noisy video games, shooting at the screen and killing virtual human beings, many of them wearing a headphone all playing on his own.
Mc Donald’s, Pizza Hut and KFC apparently reached them, at least judging from their obesity it can be only an affirmative answer!
Playstation and technology reached them right?
So are they supposed to be luckier than those poor country kids?

But I wonder … who has more and who has really nothing?

What define happiness?
Sharing a laugh and a simple game, a glass of beer if you are an adult, with your friends or having the latest electronic gadget and isolating ourselves with it?

The answer is there for us to see.
“Them” they want us to believe happiness is depending on what we have, on what we posses and what we buy but is so much false.
Happiness is only a glimpse, a moment, but is the simple act of sharing a moment with another human being.
Do not let “Them” fool us anymore, happiness is not depending on what we buy, is depending in who we are, and the simpler we live more chance we have to reach it, even for just a moment!
As we shall never forget that everything is impermanent in this world!

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Reading the newspapers is becoming a harder task every day, is so difficult to stomach some kind of news they are reporting.
At times I am so fed up to read about sick politics, corruption, war, killings, tortures and more awful things that happens around the world.
Then there are news such as this who one can only hope to be on some April’s fool edition but unfortunately are not.

On “The Nation”, 28th March 2006 edition, I had the chance to read about … space tourism!
Briefly it is reported that “… now the private sector is offering space travel, tailored to the super rich... Over the past few years, three tourists have paid a reported 20 million US dollars each to ride aboard a Russian rocket to the orbiting international space station”.

I am left really speechless, just I can think about the starving kids in Africa, the poor all over the world and I can only vomit reading such news.

Where the fuck the world is going? How could someone not be furious and angry after reading such bullshit?

Makes you sick, doesn’t it? But what it makes those “super rich” people themselves is this: detached from what the rest of us live in – the real world. What does it take to bring them back?
I would like really like to take all those “super rich” people and show them the reality of this world, how so many people are struggling to live without food, water and medicines.

I really want to cry and shout but I feel so much powerless, tired and fed up.
Is the world such a rotten hopeless place?

With the small energy that I still have I just wish is just a nightmare and that I could wake up tomorrow and find a beautiful and peaceful world without injustice!

Peace, love and freedom

Poor Planet Earth, April 5TH , 2549

© - copyright Claudio Romano

THE ILLUSION OF BEING FREE

2006-04-02T15:14:00.000+07:00

Here I am back from a visit in the Lao Popular Democratic Republic, a supposed freedomless communist state.
I came out alive, would you believe it? So are the communist not so bad?
Would you believe it?
Vientiane is a nice city, rather clean and quiet without tanks and armed forces around.
The visit in the countryside, in the villages of course did show me what I was expecting, lot of poverty but not so much different of what I have seen just days before in outskirts of Udon Thani, in the free and capitalist land of Thailand!

So what? Someone would tell me that at least in Thailand people are free while in Laos people they are under oppression, right?
Freedom?

Let’s have a look at both countries or, much better, at both systems.
Both they have a very rich and corrupted elite, while the grass-root people and the farmers suffer in poverty.
They have become so accustomed in being exploited and neglected that now they can accept anything just for the sake of being able to survive.

So what is the difference between those two countries which are representing apparently opposite systems?
Illusion is the only real difference.
In Thailand people live and still believe to be free, they have the illusion to be free like anyone in the so called “free liberal world” but it is just an illusion, of course.
Try to shout against “Them”, those who have the power, against those who control the economy, those who control everything such as the big multinationals… and then you tell me.
People are free until they do what “They” tell them to do.

At least in Laos people know when they are allowed to speak and when not!
They perfectly know where are the boundaries set by those who rules, they are not fooled by the illusion of being free.
In the so called “free world”, you never know when and how much you will pay, but be sure that if you do something against the wrong people, you will pay.
Freedom? Mind you, I have kindly been asked to abstain to express my opinion by a thai blog (http://www.thai-blog.com/) because of my political views, many were fearing the blacklisting of the blog.
Is this freedom? And this did not happen in Laos but Thailand.

In every country, in every nation and land you are free if you are rich and never if you are poor, if you are poor you just have to remain silent under those above you, being in a communist or capitalist country… not any difference.

But I do repeat, at least in Laos people are not living under any illusion. They may not be free and they know it, they know who is “Them” and what “They” want, they are perfectly aware of it. Instead the multitudes in the capitalistic countries are not even having such awareness, just they continue living in an illusion, the illusion of being free and they do not even know who are “Them”, who they have to fear!

Freedom? Yes, there seem to be some kind of curfew after 10 o’clock p.m. in Vientiane, not really a great thing but I wouldn’t really mind if the Thai government would do the same in Pattaya, or other places such some streets of Bangkok or Phuket.
This would surely limit people’s freedom but will surely prevent children prostitution, children exploitation and prevent hordes of western paedophiles being eternally on the prowl.
Vientiane was a good change in this respect. Limits on tourism would not be such a bad thing since tourism could bring some quick money but it really can harm and spoil a nation and its culture in the long run, and I do not have to look too far to have the proof of this.

So freedom is just an illusion, just a word.
The only way we could attain it is by freeing ourselves, from inside.
How? I do not know, is up to anyone of us, it is our personal path and search.
Someone may achieve it through meditation but there may be so many ways.
I do personally believe that starting from being detached from earthly and material matters could be a first step, we could start being free from the market laws and rules and this is the only way we can also hurt “Them”, where it only matters, their pockets and the dollar!
The first step to freedom is to stop being a customer and a consumer and to be a human being!
The second, in my humble opinion, is to get rid of fear, fear is paralyzing us from doing anything, from exploring life and from expressing ourselves and our opinions.
We are living in a world ruled by fear, “They” want us to live in fear in order to be always scared, docile and ready to follow the flock, never to ask questions and blindly believe in what “They” tell us.
This is happening in every kind of government or religion or organisation at any latitude.
Never question anything and be afraid of the consequences!
In the past slaves were having chains now the method is surely more subtle and kinder, but the final result is the same, we are not free as they were not free!

So what to chose between a red flag and the dollar?
There is surely a middle path in between and this middle path is just inside ourselves and it is where we only can find our freedom!

Peace, love and freedom!

I just would like to add one small last thing.
While wandering around Laotian cities and villages I was really surprised to see many young people and children.
I then thought that maybe, I repeat maybe, is not completely true that the communists are eating their children… or not?

Planet Earth, April 2nd , 2549

© - copyright Claudio Romano

IS THIS THE WORLD WE CREATED?

2006-03-31T10:55:00.000+07:00

So my wife and I we are planning another visit to Switzerland.
To avoid last year’s experience when we’ve been stuck there without being allowed to leave the country since no embassy or consulate would give us a visa to go to Italy even for a capuccino or France to visit my brother we thought about asking for a “preventive” visa.

What is wrong with that?
Countries they are launching “preventive wars” why a normal, quiet middle aged couple can not ask for a “preventive visa”?

Impossible it is. Without presenting flight reservations, hotel bookings nobody would grant us a visa, this means that even if we would like to spend a weekend in Italy (for example) we could not.

This left me wondering… is this the world we have created? Is this the world of freedom all politicians are blabbing about?
Surely not, if you ask my very humble opinion.

It looks more and more like those nightmarish Sci-Fi movies where to build a perfect world, freedom was neglected, a thing of the past.
It is increasingly looking like that Spielberg movie “Minority Report”, where the world was dominated by some “prevention police”, where the government to prevent crime abolished freedom.
Is this the world we want?
Not me.

Someone may object that all this is for our own safety, part of the post 9/11 scenario.
Nah, try to speak about safety and security to the kids in Baghdad, though!

Or maybe isn’t that the rich European countries are so much afraid about illegal immigration, they are afraid about the flow of people who come from the III, IV, V, VI world in search of job, fortune and money?
Shouldn’t they instead have a look at how resources are NOT shared in the world, at how wealth is only a privilege for the few chosen ones instead of being shared among everyone?
Too much for a small number of people, nothing for the multitudes!

In any case I sincerely doubt that terrorists and dangerous criminals when they travel they go through embassies’ channels. Surely they have their own “travel agents” and do not need to bother asking for a visa.
Is my wife a potential threat to European countries?
Maybe she leads a double life I am not aware of!
But I can assure she will never look for a job in Europe, of this I am sure!

And about dangerous terrorists, I know for sure that one is always traveling in first class, on the “Air Force One”!

Planet Earth, March 31st , 2549

© - copyright Claudio Romano

TIME TO GO

2006-03-16T16:45:00.000+07:00

Yesterday while driving from Korat to Surin, I could not help but notice the big TRT boards saying to vote for party Nr. 2, the only one anyway people could vote if these mock elections will ever take place.
I just felt bad for all Thais, they have such a shameless PM.
He is supposed to be a leader of the country, so how can he divide the country in such a way?
Is he not able to see what is happening? Students, intellectuals, Monks vs. farmers, Urban people vs. farmers, South vs. North, West vs. Northeast?
A good and honest leader will realize it is time to go, for the sake of the country.
But he is not!
I admire Thai people for how much peaceful they are, I admire the way the protest have been held but the more it goes on the more dangerous the situation may become.
Is this what Takshin is waiting for? So that he can declare the State of emergency? So he can have THE DEFINITIVE ABSOLUTE POWER?

What about the situation in the South? It is all forgotten now?
What did he do to solve the problems over there, another State of Emergency but did something change?
Maybe Southern people could not easily be bought with 500 or 1.000 bahts notes like my fellow “Prachachon Issarn”?
Why didn’t he do his “unbelievable” reality show in Yala or Pattani instead of Roi Et?

Why is he not going and allow the country to move forward?

I know I am a falang so maybe I shall shut up since I am a guest of this land and I have no Thai passport but I love this country more than my own for sure, I wish I could vote here instead doing by correspondence to my own land.
My daily life is here, my friends are here and I care for them, that’s why I can not watch in silence.
When you see a friend in trouble, whatever the color of his passport is, don’t you worry for him? Won’t you try to help him? Won’t you hope he can overcome the bad times?
This will be possible here, only when Takshin will pack his bags and go somewhere to enjoy all the wealth he has amassed during the latest years as PM.
Now he has the chance to relax and enjoy life, why can’t he just do that?

It is not a matter of party color, not about being right wing or left wing is just about a man who with his stubbornness is bringing the country on the brink of disaster. He shall go not TRT be banned, then let’s have the elections.

Of course if one day this will happen, there would be the “not so little matter” who will be the one to replace him, are we sure this person will be better than him?
No, but I doubt he can be any worse.

Love and Peace

BAN NAUDOM, March 16th, 2549

C – COPYRIGHT / CLAUDIO ROMANO

THERE IS ONLY ONE JIMMY JOHNSTONE

2006-03-14T16:38:00.000+07:00

Yesterday, Monday March 13, Jimmy Johnstone passed away. He was probably the best ever player to grace the hooped Celtic strip. This is a short excerpt of chapter 3 of “Boh”, the book I am writing. It is obviously dedicated to this little big player and man.
LONG LIVE JIMMY JOHNSTONE.

One of my childhood’s most important moments has been the Champions Cup semi-finals match between Celtic and Inter Milan (at that time it was not yet called Champions Business League).
I don't exactly remember what year it was (for this is enough to check this competition’s yearbooks), the game was in Glasgow, it was pouring rain and in the Celtic team, a team that was wearing a strange shirt with white and green stripes, a small but incredibly gifted player was playing, he was having red hair and the number 7 on his shorts.
Celtic lost the penalty shoot-out, but that night was the night when my love affair with Celtic started. The most lasting love story of my life, a love affair without betrayals, really and literally through good and bad times and that will last until the day I will be lying in my coffin, dressed in that famous green and white shirt, now unfortunately polluted by a sponsor’s logo, in the name of “God money” which rules everything on earth.
For me "carrot head" or "rusty head" as I was called by my friends, it was a revenge, I had finally found my role model in this small but really exciting and wonderful right winger who was wearing that strange but surely unique shirt.
From that moment my destiny was fulfilled, from that day have become a Bhoy!
Even today, more than ever, the first thing that I check when I connect to internet (wherever I may be) are Celtic’s news, new possible players, injuries, team plans or just "gossip": Celtic may well be the only constant thing of my life.
All of this thanks to Jinky? Or it is a Karmic matter? Or just Celtic is more than a simple football team, is a reason of life?
Was it also the first skirmish of my strangeness? At that time everyone I knew was supporting Inter Milan, A.C. Milan or Juventus, instead I was supporting a team nobody where I was living even knew about..

Of those years I also remember another very painful setback, the one at St. Siro Stadium. It was the Champions Cup final, against the Feyenoord. Still black and white TV images that that brought that child the first suffering caused for the love of his team.
I didn’t even know it was an end of a wonderful era, the end of the "Lisbon Lions!"
And strangely enough I have no memories of this wonderful team’s greatest triumph, if just being so happy because… my brother was an Inter fan!

And even today when I have some free time I put on my computer and start to play with some football manager game, I always choose to be the Celtic manager. Sometimes I would like to change, to try another team, but it does really not make any sense to me. Celtic or nothing!
I find a great satisfaction to create my own Celtic team, a team that wins championships and Cups. For a middle aged man it may not be really such a great achievement but at least it helps to keep alive the kid that still is living in me.

Thanks Jimmy, thanks for making me fall in love with our Celtic.
Long live Jinky, forever. Hail Hail.

BAN NAUDOM, North Eastern Thailand, March 14th, 2549

© – Copyright CLAUDIO ROMANO

PONGSIT KUMPHEE @ TAWAN DAENG, SURIN

2006-03-13T09:22:00.000+07:00

Surin, Saturday March 11th, 9.30 p.m.

I am sitting inside “Tawan Daeng” a Bar/Restaurant where soon Pongsit Kumphee will be playing live.
I like this place a lot, its walls are all painted in red, its lights are red and there are huge paintings of Che Guevara, Karl Marx and many other communists leaders. I feel home, is good to know that some corner of the world are still… red!

At ten o’clock sharp the notes of “Kid Tueng” start to fill the air, Pongsit really seems to be in good shape and so his group. Few acoustic tunes and then the sound of the electric guitars are literally calling the fans to dance close to the stage.
Not much talking, some jokes, sometimes Poo takes the time to sign some autographs (he did even sign my “Takshin get out” cap), to shake some hands and after that he would leave his music do the talking again.

He sings some of his classics, I really like “Sood jai” and “Yoo khon deaw”, wonderful music which reaches the climax with a thundering version of “Yod Chai”, rock music at his best.
Sadly after two hours of great songs an acoustic, nearly a-cappella rendition of “Tah laud way lah”, sung by the whole public marks the end of the show.
I wish for more, many of my favorites such as “Tueng Puen”, “Wung”, “Kuern Pliew” or “Luh Issarn” were missing from the set but I really did enjoy every minute of this show.

A concert played by a man who surely loves his music, a man who surely loves his fans, not an overpaid superstar but a regular and honest guy who clearly enjoyed to be among us.
No merchandising, nothing else than music and real, good “Sanook”, the joy to be together and to share the same passion and a wonderful night.
I was the only “falang” in the attendance but I really felt part of it, no differences, all people where there for this man and his music, no divisions of passport or color.

During the show I often did look around me and I could only see happy people around me, people peacefully enjoying themselves and this made me feel happy inside, I like so much the sight of happy people around me, and this was one of those magic moments where you can forget for an hour or two all struggles and enjoy yourself with your fellow human beings.

Thanks Pongsit and thanks “Tawan Daeng” for making it possible.
Please come back to Surin, soon.

BAN NAUDOM, March 12th 2549

© – Copyright CLAUDIO ROMANO

MAY THE FARCE BE WITH YOU

2006-03-11T10:52:00.000+07:00

Not so long ago I did read that soon Laos will have free elections, there will be just a very, very small peculiarity: only one party will be allowed to contest, obviously the one in power, no opposition allowed. Fair elections, indeed.
I then thought: ”it is Laos, look at the bright side, it may be the first step towards democracy”.
I could never imagine that same thing would be happening here in Thailand. Our beloved PM called new elections in a hurry, leaving the opposition unprepared and, in this way, making sure of his win.
Then the opposition rightly did decide to boycott the vote, maybe hoping that some dignity will somewhere surface and the whole farcical elections would be called off.
Nope, the greed of power is too strong and on April 2nd, Thailand will witness the most farcical election ever seen (pity it is not April 1st, that would have made more sense).

I always thought of politicians as the big business and financial power’s puppets. The real power is never in their, tied, hands but in those who “remote control” them (see Bush/Cheney/Halliburton). In Thailand we went a step further, the business grasped power, the financial power came out of the shadow and took over, not needing a puppet anymore, now its POWER is total, either financial and political.

Call it democracy?
Someone may object that nearly all Issarn (for example) did vote TRT. True, but with all respect due, I do live among these people. They are truly nice and good hearted people but with absolute no awareness about politics. They are ready to take a 500 baht note from anyone, a box of Mekhong wiskhey and cast the vote for the “benefactor”.
Why? Maybe they have been neglected, subdued for so long that, with their typical “Mai pen Rai attitude”, they know that whoever they may vote nothing will change and nothing will improve for them, so better take some immediate profit.
Maybe they are wiser than myself who I still believe in justice, I still get angry when I am witness of abuse of power, of the exploitation of the poor and when I see absolute no concerns for Human Rights.

Call it democracy? What is the alternative?
Absolute Monarchy? Maybe in Thailand it would be working, I sincerely think His Majesty the King would be a great leader for this country, people really love him and He is really genuinely concerned about them.
Impossible I fear. I wish, at least, that someone like Him will come up from the political ranks.
But then I look a bit further north, in the Kingdom of Nepal whose crown is still red with blood, where the present King had no hesitation to kill his own brother (the previous King) and his family to get power, thus igniting a cruel civil war in the country.

Dictatorship? Left or right? No difference, it scare me just to look across the Cambodian border and think what did happened not so long ago, with the world watching .. but of course there was no oil in Cambodia.

Anarchy? A dream, but clearly an utopia. A world where men would not need any government where human being could live in peace and harmony with self-governance, where there would be no rich and no poor… but better I stop dreaming, without awareness this will never happen.
And who shall give awareness to the masses? The ones in power who, in any case, only are attempting to become more powerful and the shortcut to achieve that is:
keep down the masses, never give awareness to the them. So?

Back at the starting point and I begin to wonder if those poor unaware Issarn farmers have understood things much better and faster than me… nothing will ever change… so take some money and enjoy some “Sanook”… and “Mai pen rai”.
I don’t know if I ever will be able to do that but it may really be the only option left.

Sad isn’t it?

BAN NAUDOM, 11 of March 2549

© – Copyright CLAUDIO ROMANO

SUNSHINE

2006-03-07T09:42:00.000+07:00

It is now more than 15 years since I started traveling around Asia because of the custom made "job" that has become my life.
I do not like to call it a “work”, but it is always much better than any other pompous and, perhaps, cheap terms I have been hearing in this span of time. Contrary to someone’s behavior we are absolutely not world savers guys, just people lucky enough to work with and for others and to have the chance to enrich ourselves with so many wonderful experiences and emotions.
During this period of time I have seen so many tears, so many tragedies, a lot of suffering, desperation and resignation: last among many the Tsunami.
I daily read in the newspapers stories of wars, tortures, oppressions of hundreds of innocent people, killers in the name of God, millions of starving children while a few "chosen ones" they become wealthy on their skin and skulls and I wonder... in what kind of world are we living.
But one fine day I am asked to help to re-establish a contact between two people that for a very long time, a lot of time were lost in the different waves of life.
In fact, I had the privilege to help a child (I will call her Melody, as her friends do) to get back in contact with her mother again. The lady, when she was 17 years old, left the baby shortly after her birth in an institute for adoptions, she has been left by the father and this was her only chance left.
Surely nothing special in these parts of the world, in fact the girl that lives next to me in Ban Naudom endured the same fate, the only difference is that her grandmother is now taking care of the baby and saving her from giving him up to some institution.
But it is not this story that struck my heart but the words of the letter that Melody wrote her mother, every single word dipped in the ink of love for a woman that she never met but once few months ago.
Reading the words of this 13 years old really opened my heart and made me look at the power of love, a power that enable us to overcome every trauma and every obstacle in our life.
I don't personally know Melody but it doesn't matter, I think of her as an extraordinary young woman I hope only that the world and life will not take away from her the immense gift she has: the power of unconditional love.
I don't even know her adoptive parents, but no doubt they are wonderful people because they have tried everything to enable their daughter to find her biological mother.
I know that in many of such cases there is lot of jealousy, the fear of losing the child’s affection and love but it did not happened in this case.
For this I admire them a lot, I totally admire this family that has allowed me to acknowledge that love is still among people even though in a world pervaded with hatred.
Melody’s words have been for me like rays of sunshine piercing the black clouds that overhang our planet and our own existence.

Love is still there!

Ban Naudom, March 6th 2549

© - COPYRIGHT / CLAUDIO ROMANO

POWER TO THE PEOPLE

2006-03-02T12:13:00.000+07:00

I HAVE WRITTEN THIS PIECE AT MY ARRIVAL IN BANGKOK, AND BEFORE THE DEPARTURE FOR MY USUAL VISIT OUR INDIANS’ PROJECTS.
THEN TONIGHT, WHILE I WAS PREPARING MY BAG FOR THE LAST PART OF THE TOUR, MY WIFE ON THE PHONE TOLD ME THAT, FINALLY, TAKSHIN DID RESIGN AND NEW ELECTIONS WILL TAKE PLACE IN APRIL.
THIS REALLY MAKES ME EXTREMELY HAPPY, I HOPE ONLY THAT THAI PEOPLE WHEN THE MOMENT TO VOTE WILL COME WILL NOT FALL AGAIN IN THE TRAP OF HIS FAKE PROMISES AND WILL REJECT TO BE OFFERED MONEY IN EXCHANGE OF A VOTE AS THE “MAGICIAN” HAS ALREADY STARTED TO DO.
IN EVERY CASE I AM HAPPY, IS A PEOPLE’S VICTORY AGAINST POWER... I AM GLAD AND I AM PROUD THAT THIS HAS HAPPENED IN THAILAND, MY ADOPTIVE COUNTRY. I AM HAPPY TO HAVE WITNESSED THE RISE OF THE PEOPLE POWER IN A PEACEFUL WAY AND TO HAVE FELT SUCH A POSITIVE ENERGY.
IF ONLY THE AMERICANS WOULD DO THE SAME…!
Sambalpur Express, Train Calcutta-Rourkela, February 25th, 2006

A trip of about 30 minutes on a scooter-taxi separates me from the terminal of the BTS of On Nut to Morawan.
However in this short time it seems to me to fly in India, in the worse nightmares of the slums of Calcutta or Mumbai.
Once I reach the slum I can’t believe my eyes. In this place about 2000 human being are trying to live and to survive, some of them in miserable huts others in rotten houses standing on stagnant dirty water where many rats, the size of a cat, live and prosper and where dead fishes float.
Here is assembled the worst of the human existence.
I see old people, handicapped children, girls holding babies and I don't understand if they are their mothers or sisters (but I fear the first option being the most probable), AIDS is flourishing, as many more sicknesses.
Unemployment, prostitution are reigning unchallenged and I believe that in this rotten microcosm we can find the whole catalogue of human miseries.
This in the South East outskirts in Bangkok, the glimmering city that the rich Thai Prime Minister is trying to promote to the business and tourist world communities as the principal centre of South East Asia. The same man that in one of his many electoral tricks has promised to eradicate poverty from Thailand in 3 years.
In this slum there would be an enormous amount of things to do, a whole slum to be restored, a generation lost to recover and another to be saved before it follows the same path of the former one.
Unfortunately we can not do much, except to try to help the youngest ones, to help them in their studies and help them to regularly school. This is the only alternative to a life of degrade in the slum, a goalless life.
I admit that in the three years since I have lived in Thailand I have never fully understood the phenomenon of the prostitution, why so many girls choose this work. Besides a cultural factor (totally stranger to western mentality) the clearest answer I ever had was given to me in this slum, if selling our own body is the only possibility to get out of this hell... I swear that I would do the same
(the only problem would be to find a buyer for my old and fat body, I fear).
This said without any hypocrisy.

Bangkok, a city that sparks so many different feelings in me.
On one side it fascinates me and I even like it (even if only for the limited period to my brief visits) while on the other hand it seems to me that it has become a city symbolising the sick politics that are, according to my very modest opinion, bringing the nation towards disaster.
Bangkok is a city that is sucking the rest of the Kingdom’s “blood”.
Nearly all investments are made in the capital, all the young and active working forces are leaving the countryside to search there fortune and wealth.
A city that sees the proliferation of luxury malls, (Siam Paragon, Platinium Fashion Mall to name the latest) to attract rich tourists and their absurd shopping mania but build by poor Issarn’s masons, without a working contract and paid with very low daily wages.
A city that is drying up the countryside which is the pulsating heart of the nation which is now populated only by old people, children and old “falangs” like me.
One more example of non-development where a few selected ones become wealthier and the masses poorer.
Bangkok is becoming the extension of the megalomaniac ego of Thai Prime Minister.
Richest man of the country, owner of a media empire that has practically bought his power.
Its misdoings are sadly well known at these latitudes.
How to forget when he had the bright idea to buy 30% of Liverpool F.C. shares, and this with public money?He was planning to finance the operation with a new state lottery, like there would be need of more gambling in this country.
Then “the funny man” did organize his own reality show at Roi Et, one of the poorest provinces of the country.
So for 5 days with the television cameras after him, broadcasting live 24 / 24, he did began his crusade against poverty.
Result? Obviously the poverty will surely remain a daily problem for many Thais and, unfortunately, Takshin will perhaps have conquered more votes from those poor country people as he personally distributed 1.000 bahts notes to them, always with camera behind his back.
Is this his recipe to defeat poverty?
His latest misdoing?
He recently sold one of his companies, obviously it was on his kids and relatives’ names to a Singaporean government company.
This, of course, brought more money to his already huge coffers.
Not happy with it, he did find a way not to pay any taxes on the transaction, as he cunningly prepared the ground for such operation in changing some laws in his favour.
Fortunately it seems that Thai people are waking up now and part of the population, driven by some monks, intellectuals and students are asking the PM to resign.
Will they succeed?
I doubt it, but however it is good that people are rebelling against him and are not keen to stand anymore such power games.
I hope only that this popular and peaceful insurrection can continue until it will achieve his goal.
It is indeed comforting to know that people still can succeed in democratic protest and to revolt against the greed of those in power and their exploitation of the masses.
This may give hope and an example to many other subdued people of this world
Udon Thani is 500 km away from Bangkok but the two places are ideally linked by an invisible thread considering that the most part of the inhabitants of the previous slum are coming from Issarn.
They leave their rural villages to live in the slum, to pursue their dreams sold by the unbridled capitalism that has taken possession of our world and existence. The same story than could be told by those who dwell the slums of Calcutta, Rio, Mumbai and every other world metropolis.
In Udon I have been witness of situation of poverty and desperation that I had not even seen in India.
What to do to solve this problem? If I had the answer I would be up for the Nobel prize, but I don't have any answer except to humbly work for some of these children
Helping them to school I am convinced is the only possible solution, to give them education, to try to interrupt the indiscriminate flow of people that from the countryside move to Bangkok chasing an unreachable dream.
At least if and when they will do it, they will carry with them a baggage of education that can allow them to find a decent job in a decent environment and enough awareness not to be wildly exploited.
It is evident and obvious that to help 100 children to Udon Thani won't surely change the geography Bangkok’s slums, but it is a beginning and is what we can do in our small and humble way but it may be even more that Mr. Takshin will ever do, as he is too much busy to protect his own interest, his power and to make richer his already rich friends to worry about the suffering masses.
And thanks God it seems I am not the only one thinking this way in this beautiful country which I love so much.

Bangkok, February 22nd, 2549

C / Copyright – CLAUDIO ROMANO

CELTIC, WHAT'S THE FECK!

2006-01-12T09:35:00.000+07:00

IN THE WAKE OF ANOTHER PAINFUL AND UNBELIEVABLE DEFEAT (THIS TIME WE LOST 2-1 TO CLYDE IN THE SCOTTISH CUP) I WISH TO PUBLISH WHAT I DID WRITE IN OCCASION OF AN EVEN MORE PAINFUL DEAFEAT… CELTIC FANS KNOW WHAT I MEAN!
CELTIC: WHAT THE FECK!

SUNDAY May 21st, 2548.

Last game of the Scottish Premiership season.
Celtic, "my" Celtic is about to play his last game, a wee win against Motherwell would be enough to secure another championship title.
One simple win at Fir Park, home of a modest team that sit at mid table and we are champions again, yes once again.
Desperately I’m trying to connect my old laptop to internet in order to follow the game on line. After many failed tries I finally succeed.

The game is already started and we are 1-0 up, Chris Sutton scored and our hated enemies, the “unmentionables”, are still 0-0, this means we have now 4 points advantage and ... we are champions.
Middle of the second half, always 1-0 but Mordor’s Orcs scored, we still have 2 points advantage. The internet line is awful, I got disconnected several times but I still manage to follow the game. A second goal would surely ease my tension but we seem to waste so many opportunities up front.

Five minutes to go, both the games are 1-0, but I’m really getting more and more nervous, I fear that we may pay the price of so many wasted chances.... and at the 88th minute, here is the equaliser! F”*%!
I shout, I curse, my wife watches me like if she is unable to recognize her husband anymore! Two minutes later, with the head between my hands, I take another other look at the screen and we are 1-2 down, those "bastards" of Motherwell have scored two goals in the span of two minutes, Mordor’s Orcs won 1-0 and we have lost the championship, f”£*!

I feel bad, so bad, I feel so bad on Saturday evening, and I feel even worse on Sunday. I remain silent all day, no words, just a wee murmur sometimes, nothing else and nothing more.
My wife, poor lady, she does not understand and I cannot expect that she will, but she knows that I suffer for one "stupid" football game and, remarkably enough, she do very much respect my pain.
As time goes by the anger makes room for the sadness and this gives time to
think and to reflect and… I wonder:

HOW COME WE HUMANS CAN GET BOASTED OR PULLED DOWN DEPENDING ON A SPORT RESULT?
WHY WE DO WASTE SOME OF OUR PRECIOUS ENERGIES IN SUCH AN IRRATIONAL WAY?

What make it happen that thousand miles from Glasgow, one Swiss living in Thailand can get deeply depressed because of one Celtic’s defeat?
And at the same time one expatriate receives a SMS from very good friend from Verona, Italy that transmits as much desperation?

Without mentioning the message that I did receive from my dear friend David who, poor guy, lives in Glasgow!
I wonder what makes so strong the pain of defeat?
Is the fact that to our defeat gave the Championship away to our most hated rivals, “the unmentionables”.?
I can surely assert that if we had lost the championship in favour of, let’s say, Hibernian the pain wouldn’t have been so deep and severe.
It surely is he knowledge that our defeat means joy for the "Mordor’s Orcs” that makes our pain much more deep and intense.
This inspite of fair play and sportsmanship.
Are we all potential Hooligans?
Is stronger the love for our team or the hate for our rivals?

And what is the need we have to drive ourselves crazy for a football,
hockey, basket or baseball team?
Isn’t our life already filled with too many worries, stress and pain?
Then why make it even more stressful and complicate with these irrational passions?
What did practically change in my life after May 21st? Nothing at all!
What would have changed if in that same fateful day Celtic had won?
Nothing at all!
Then why I felt so bad and down?
What brings me to support a football team?

Surely, sport in general has always been used by those in power to bring the masses into submission, to promote their own agenda and raise their own rating, and unfortunately many of this governments were and are dictatorial ones.
Sport is surely used to please the sleeping and unaware masses, to hide from them the real existential problems.
Sport derails the anger of people towards a mistaken direction, where it brings no real change and is therefore extremely useful to whose are in power!
But myself, a Swiss from Thailand, why I do have Celtic so much in my
heart? I surely cannot blame any government for this!
Why in my body flows green and white blood?
We, the fans, use to say that this isn’t just a football club, that
we are one great family, Celtic is nothing less than a faith but this enough to explain it all?

The days are passing by, the pain slowly disappear leaving just traces of bitterness but another game is approaching, the Scottish Cup Final.
May 28th, Saturday I will once again try to connect my laptop and follow my Celtic.
In the meantime another thought surfaces my mind.
Isn’t sport also a metaphor of the life?
I think about the Motherwell game, so many wasted chances and then, finally and unfortunately, unavoidable the defeat.
And I wonder how many chances in our life we do waste to do and say
the simplest of things?
To say to our beloved one that we love her/him, to say and daily show such feeling.
How many chances do we waste to embrace and to kiss our kids, our parents, our siblings, our friends and also our enemies?
How many chances do we waste to make peace with ourselves and the others as well?
How many chances do we waste to say sorry to the ones we know to have hurt?
I do believe that we really lose many of these wonderful opportunities to win or at least draw in the match of our life, maybe because we think we are too much busy with our businesses or our pride to realise that there is something more important and vital than that!
The dramatic side of the story is that, contrary to Celtic that always has a next game in which he can try to make up for the disappointment, we, in
our life, not always have this possibility. Better we never forget that!
Saturday, 28th of May 2548:
An Alan Thompson’s goal gives Celtic the Scottish Cup, we beat Dundee United 1-0 and I am very happy.
This has been also the last game in charge for Martin O’Neill, the manager who quickly became a legend for all of us Celtic fans. MoN decided to leave the job to assist his seriously ill wife.
I wish, with all my heart, all the best to both of them.
Another metaphor of the life, the abandonment sense that has hit all us supporters, the refusal of some of us for the new manager who is only guilty of following Martin in being the Celtic manager.
Denial, not acceptance, refusal of any change how many times have we faced those feelings in our existence? Sport metaphor of the life?
In any case all my best wishes to Martin and from the bottom of my heart many thanks for all the triumphs you have given us!
And welcome to Gordon, hoping that you will add more trophies to our glorious club. Good luck!

BAN NAUDOM, North Eastern Thailand, May 29th, 2548

Please visit www.dannyboy.ch

C / Copyright / Claudio Romano 2005

A WORLD WITH NO "I"

2006-01-06T10:20:00.000+07:00

So 2005 is gone, 2006 has come and nothing has, obviously, changed. New Year’s celebration are gone and life is clearly back to normal as it is confirmed by the fact that, driving my way to Bangkok on highway 226, I can see many children slowly walking back to their school.
Business as usual.

It has been the first time I spent the New Year festivities in Bannok and I was kind of eagerly waiting for this moment. It turned out nothing special if not another occasion to observe and try to understand a way of life and a culture that I realise are so much different than mine.
We had a family gathering with my wife’s siblings coming from Bangkok to our matriarch home, few drinks and a dinner with “som tam”, “pra ra” (not too much happy was I as they are the only two things I really do not like about here) and, thanks God, some rice and Tom Kha.
I brought some wine from Europe that nobody really seemed to appreciate… except me of course.

But it was nice, nice to see all those people who were genuinely happy to be together, all this big family made of smaller and broken families. Nobody cared if some were broken families, there was a real feeling of bonding together and this contrary to what may happen in Europe. Our neighbours were having a good time singing a karaoke and, I can tell from the way they were singing, drinking a lot of Leo Beer and Mekong whiskey.

The most beautiful part of the evening has been some kind of lottery which gave so much fun to everyone. Children, “weiloon” and old ladies were meant to draw a number and see if they would get a very simple prize or, maximum, 20 bahts.
It was amazing to witness how such a simple thing could generate so much happiness between all people of any age. It was fun, pure and healthy fun. I really did enjoy every moment of it, I did enjoy the simplicity and the atmosphere, sadly imagining how unthinkable would be having the same kind of “sanook” in Europe where everything is more and more sophisticated.
I am not writing this words with western contempt and the usual bullshit “poor but happy (which is totally false I can tell you after 15 year of social work in India, Nepal and Thailand)”, but it was refreshing for me to be part of such a collective way to enjoy a particular and very happy moment. Wish I had more of the same in the future.

Another thing which is amazing me is the whole concept of family which, in my humble opinion, is so much different than in the west. There (in the west) family is basically made by a limited number of people (father mother and kids) here family has a much wider meaning. What is best? I do not know, and I think is not absolutely important but what I am thinking is that the Thai family structure is likely to offer a safety net for broken families’ children.
In either sides of the world the number of so called “broken families” is ever increasing with mostly negative effects on children.
But while in the west after the parent’s split children are left with a single parent, it seems to me that here in Thailand in the same case scenario children have the “umbrella” of a huge number of relatives who can make them feel their love, care, affection and a sense of belonging.
Of course, this is only my impression which could well be wrong, but as a divorced parent myself I’ve had a lot of soul searching, and pain, on the matter.
In any case I like those big families, where people may come and go but always they will find someone waiting for them, no matter what.

Speaking of which here is another matter that has been in my poor brain for quite a long time.
Naudom is a small, limited society and a world where it seems there is no “I” letter.

It seems to me that everyone is there for each other, always ready and willing to help and forget about himself for the sake of the community.
This makes me wonder if I finally did discover some kind of successful form of socialism.

The side effect of this discovery is that now I can see clearly how still I am self centred compared to the village dwellers.

I think though this may not entirely be my fault, this is how the environment affects the individuals.
To my excuse is the fact that I did grow up in a hugely capitalistic society, a society based on the individual, on competition which is actually putting each one of us against the other.
The illusion of success turns us into beasts ready to kill (metaphorically, but not only) each other, with no mercy, no regards and respect for our fellows humans.

In a rural and simple society made of farmers this kind of wicked competition appears to be totally missing, this is a mutual society where everyone helps each other where all that matters is common welfare and not the individual success.

And even though everyone can tell I am always ready to help too, bring some sick old lady to hospital, helping carrying heavy rice bags but how many times I did that with joy in my heart?
Or instead how many times I thought… “Oh God, I have to do this and that again”?
Honestly too many, seldom I did it a smile on my face and in my heart and this appears to be is the big difference between me and them.

This is probably the biggest hurdle I have to overcome to finally blend in the village society’s life. Shall I try to put the community first and “forget” about myself a bit more.

Living in Ban Naudom is bringing me back to the root of human existence, but somehow I still am unable to cope with this process, I suppose it will be still a long hard road for me, to fight my inner demons and leave behind all the wicked influence that have tarnished my personality and my person.

Or am I being once again too hard on myself?
Am I idealizing a place, seeing what I wish to see and not what really is there to be seen?

I have, as usual, no answers just questions but one sure fact it is that I have still a lot to learn about life and myself and every day is a new lesson for this old Khun Phu and I would like to thank my wife and Naudom people for those lessons.

BAN NAUDOM, January 2nd 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

WHAT A WONDERFUL WORLD

2006-01-03T15:16:00.000+07:00

Is there any better way to start the New Year than having a peaceful bicycle ride through Surin’s countryside roads?
Not for me, at least.

On the afternoon of January 1st, I found myself surrounded by the dried rice fields and their total silence.
The only visible living beings were few cows, some bullocks and some beautiful white feathered birds.
The sky was as blue as it can be only decorated by some white clouds that sometimes were hiding the shining sun.
I was slowly riding my bike, looking around me when an old and beautiful song started playing in my mind, it was like I could listen to Mr. Armstrong’s voice singing: “...what a wonderful world”.
Yes is still a wonderful world to live in, no matter that a minority of human beings are trying their evil best to destroy it, this remains such a wonderful world.

And as I was approaching my village I heard some noises, some music still coming out from a New Year’s Party loudspeaker and some children laughing and shouting.
I looked at my right and I saw few kids diving, jumping and swimming in a small pond having lot of fun… and once again I told to myself “… what a wonderful world”.

All this just reminded me that life is basically a simple and wonderful thing, even with all its struggles, pain and grief, and I felt lucky to be still part of it… and while thinking about this another questions popped up my mind…”Who actually needs Siam Paragorn, a Platinium Fashion Mall and always much more extreme consumerism?”
Not me, at least.

For this old Khun Phu a really nice and quiet way to start another year.

Ban Naudom, January 1st, 2549

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

THE POWER OF A PHOTO

2005-12-31T15:46:00.000+07:00

Casually looking at some of my kids’ old photos, a heavy veil of sadness fell upon me.

I could see them when they were just some toddlers, when they where growing up and I realised how much I have lost not being there every moment with them.

I looked at how they were so beautiful (still they are, of course) and I think about the time that went away and the moments lost. No matter what I will do those moments will never come back.

Nearly I cried at watching my small Marti, I did split with her mother when she was still really small and I lost and made her lose so many precious moments.
No matter how many Avril Lavigne and Simple Plan concerts we will watch together, I know we will always have that huge black hole in our life.
And is the same for all the others and I realise that this is a wound that never will be healed, never for them but surely never for me too.

I know nothing can change the past and all we have to do is to live a good present, but this being surely a very good theory is sometimes very hard to apply for humble human being such as I am.

Sorry Kids, may you have a brilliant New Year and a life full of love and peace.
I love you so much, really.

Ban Naudom, 1st of January, 2549
C – COPYRIGHT – Claudio Romano

SAILING ABOVE CLOUDS

2005-12-30T15:32:00.000+07:00

In the last month I have visited 4 different countries (5 if I include Issarn which is sometimes a nation by itself, as it is so much different than the rest of Thailand) and flown over two continents.
I’ve lost count of the many miles I’ve been travelling by air, train or car.

This reminds me of when I was a boy (and this means centuries ago) and how I’ve always liked to listen to Celtic folk music, surely too many groups to mention but anyway I would like to remember the wonderful Silly Wizard, De Dannann, The Pogues, Runrig, Christy Moore among others.

Always I’ve been fascinated by their immigrations songs, mostly tales of sailors and fishermen leaving their shores to go in new places in search of fortune, a new life and new opportunities.
The pain of parting from their dear ones, the adventurous journey and the usually sad and beautiful melodies were really catching my heart and soul. Please try to listen to Silly Wizard’s “Sweet Dublin Bay”, “Loch Tay Boat Song”, “Fhear a Bhata” or “Fisherman’song” to have a brilliant example.

Now while I am on board of flight TG 971 which brings me back to Thailand for the umpteenth time it just strikes my mind how my life has become similar to those songs and their lyrics.
How I can feel the same pain of parting from the loved ones and the joy of a reunion with some other beloved one, the tiredness and the possible dangers of this life.

The big difference is that I am not on board of a ship which floats above the ocean’s waves but I am on an airship dancing, and sometimes shaking, above clouds.

Did I become like those heartbroken heroes of such age old songs?
Am I a sailor above clouds?
Working in 4 different countries (Thailand, Switzerland, India and Nepal), living in Thailand and having my very, very dear ones in Switzerland make me an emigrant “sailor above clouds”?

Surely, I am but not a heartbroken one, in fact is the contrary as in the process I made some people heartbroken, and this will be my biggest regret.
But now I really think I was made for this kind of life, I was simply born for that.

I am like a tree with no roots and at the same time with so many wonderful flowers on my branches.
I have no home but at the same time many homes.
I have many people to love and I hope someone may love me back.
I have no other certainty that life is impermanent, to open my eyes every morning and to feel alive and be aware that the same day may well be my last one on earth.

And during my recent stay Switzerland I clearly discovered that I surely do not belong there anymore even though is my country of birth, but at the same time I can tell that for certain I do not belong to Thailand yet, even though I like very much to live here.
I do not belong anywhere, is this sad or this means I am lucky and free?
Is this meaning I have no other attachments than the people I love?
How is possible that I do not have any sense of belonging anywhere?
Am I such an individualistic person or an enlightened one (sorry for me but I bet is the first option)?

Will my life ever change?
I doubt, I will probably never be able to stop in any place for a long time.

Am I a natural born rambler?
It may well be.

Is this a way to escape from something or someone?
No, it did it so often and for so long in the past but when finally I acknowledged and accepted my nature I suddenly stopped escaping from things and in this process I came to accept finally my many, too many flaws and my blatant imperfections.

I came to accept my dark side and my grey side that for years I refused to acknowledge, I just wanted to have one bright and white side, the good side. I always wanted to be the good knight in a shining white armour but finally I accepted I am not and I will never be.

And now I also know that there is no good, there is no bad, we go through things in our life, through experiences that are moulding us in a way we may never have expected.

This is way I am now, with my grey and dark sides, life’s experiences helped me to discover and, most important, accepting them.

Yes, I am a sailor above clouds with all my human flaws possible, I hope not to break more hearts again but mine will never be broken as I have too many people to love and to care about.

PEACE AND LOVE.

Bangkok, 29th of December 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

MERRY CHRISTMAS A F@#*!

2005-12-25T16:04:00.000+07:00

I would like so much to wish everyone a very Happy Christmas but how can I?
What is Christmas anyway?
A little more than a week ago I was in Bangkok, capital city of a country nearly 100% Buddhist and I saw that all shops and Malls were having Christmas decorations.
At every Sky Train Station huge screen were brainwashing people with every kind of Christmas shopping advertisement.
And if ever I should ask anyone in Ban Naudom about Jesus Christ, they would look at me wondering what the hell I am saying!

I was in Milan few days ago and at all underground train stations there were, once again, huge screens deafening people and pushing them to buy, buy, buy, buy and buy again… is Christmas.

And here back in Switzerland I can see around me faces of people who are so stressed by their shopping duties, I can see they have their hands full of bags but absolutely no joy in their eyes.

F@#*! Does anyone even remember what is supposed to mean Christmas?
And the fellow who is writing these words is surely not a good Christian, actually I am not a Christian at all but it really disturbs me to see that this f@#*!@g capitalistic society is polluting everything, even what is supposed to be sacred, such a Christmas.

I wish so much that all people in the world one day would go on strike and will stop buying anything for Christmas and any other artificially created festivals.
We people have the power to send a strong message to those in power if we only would want to, if only we could be aware of the way we are used.

But we’d rather close our eyes, our ears and go on like slaves, buying every kind of shit the system is selling us and, worse, in doing that we believe to reach happiness!

So f@#* Christmas, at least this kind of Christmas.

Pura, 25th of December, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

A NEW HOPE?

2005-12-20T22:28:00.000+07:00

CHAVEZ AND MORALES, A NEW HOPE RISING FROM SOUTH AMERICA?

BOH!

2005-12-18T19:15:00.000+07:00

Back in the freezing cold of Lugano (Switzerland) this morning I did enter a Bar to drink a coffee that could have maybe provided some much needed warmth to my old body.
I did order my “Macchiato” and I took a look around. I could see the obvious many beer bottles surrounded by all kind of whisky, vodka and so on. Then I saw a small orange bottle, “Outox” said the label.
It seems is a kind of antidote against the effects of alcohol abuse and all its many collateral effects.
Not bad idea at all, first they sell to people lot of alcohol, driving them drunk and then they sell this “Outox”, to make them sober again.
It is the same as Mr. Bush would go to Iraq to bring medical help to the same people he killed and tortured.
My small and simple brain finds very difficult to understand all of this, I know everything is fucking business .. but…
BOH!

Pura, December 18th, 2005

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

MEDITATION

2005-12-14T07:46:00.000+07:00

Aware of the suffering created by fanaticism and intolerance, we are determined not to be idolatrous about or bound to any doctrine, theory or ideology, even Buddhist ones.
Buddhist teachings are guiding means to help us learn to look deeply and to develop our understanding and compassion. They are not doctrines to fight, kill or die for.

THICH NHAT HANH

THE GREATEST UNANSWERED QUESTIONS IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND 3

2005-12-13T17:53:00.000+07:00

The Swiss are exporting cheese, chocolate and watches.
Thais are exporting rice and silk.
Chinese are exporting nearly everything available on earth.
From Japan we got all sophisticated Hi-Tech stuff.
Mostly those items are exported by sea or air.

And what about the mighty United States?
Well, they (or at least their president) pretend to export democracy and freedom.
How?
Through tanks, war planes and bombs.

The question is:
How can they export something they absolutely do not posses (under such president)?

THE GREATEST UNANSWERED QUESTIONS IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND 2

2005-12-07T14:24:00.000+07:00

May someone tell me please who the fuck gave the right to the British to rename Mount Sagarmatha after someone called Mr. Everest?

Colonial rule?

LONG LIVE MAHATMA GANDHI:

Kathmandu, December 3rd , 2548

LONG LIVE HIS MAJESTY

2005-12-06T08:57:00.000+07:00

I always have been opposed to any form of authority being teacher, politicians, preachers, army people or else.
But funnily enough I have a great admiration for Thailand`s King, moslty because He really loves and cares for His people.
So today December 5th, 2548, I would like to to wish KING BHUMIBOL a very happy birthday and as all Thais today would say....

LONG LIVE HIS MAJESTY.

THE SKY ROAD HOME

2005-12-04T23:48:00.000+07:00

As I comfortably sit in a large Business Class seat on board of flight TG 320 I am heading home.
I am thinking back and reflecting about my short but surely beautiful stay in Nepal.

I liked it a lot, I did appreciate so much being back in Nepal after such a long time.
I really did like the place, its gorgeous mountains, its wonderful and beautiful children and its people kindness.
I saw a lot of armed forces around, lot of check posts but no trouble and at the same time, probably, many hidden Maoist saw me around.
This situation is very bad for the people who are, once again, the real losers.
Pokhara is a wonderful place, but its restaurants and hotels are depressingly empty.
Many tourists scared by media reports (who as usual I suspect did blow things out of proportion) are deserting the place.
Tourism is not a solution for real development since it has lot of harmful side effects, but nevertheless those people and many other here were living (rather well) thanks to it, but for the moment all is finished and they really struggle and suffer.
And the thoughts that the fighting parties are doing it for “the people” shall not be of any great consolation to them.

Apart falling in love with the whole Himalayan range, two moments are the landmark of this visit,

First moment: I just arrived in Techo, where we are starting our new project when, and while I was wandering around the playground full of shouting children, one sweet and beautiful small girl smiled and ran towards me saying “Hallo, what is your name? My name is Subarna Mali” another one followed and she said “And me I am Deepika Mali”.
I answered them, they smiled again while trying to repeat my name and then they went on playing Badminton.
A short, simple but sweet moment that will remain in my memory for a long time.

The other happened just yesterday evening, after I came back to Kathmandu from Pokhara.
My Buddha Air plane once again performed its duty and I landed at the domestic airport.
Walking down the road to the airport exit where all taxis were waiting I did notice so many brass pots along each side of the road in perfect line, with food on top of them.
They were for the King who was returning from a business trip in Africa.
Down, where the airport road meets the main one, army, police and mostly school children with Nepali flag.
I`ve been told that they have been forced by government forces to attend and wave at the King, otherwise funds will be cut for the whole school, same for the adults on the streets. It seems they were mainly government employees and they would have lost their jobs if they did not welcome the King.
People have been brought by buses from the country side, offered money just to make number and wave the national flag.
I could not believe it, as me and my friends were walking in the streets full of police, army and the people who have been compelled to be there.
What is this? It may have been probably the mostly absurd abuse of power that I have ever personally witnessed.

Forget writing about the way the King came to power, just after having wiped away the former King`s family (incidentally his brother) as every one here knows but, of course, nobody is allowed to talk about it. This story would make an excellent Hollywood movie script, but unfortunately is reality for the Nepalese people.
The Maoists are against the King who has curbed every kind of freedom, how can I blame them?
I was looking to the sky above me, I saw once again the wonderful Himalayan range, it was nearly sunset and the sun rays were giving it a wonderful reddish colour.
Under them man is still self destructing, hungry for money and power. What a pity.

I liked Nepal and I will come again for sure, beautiful, inspiring and very interesting.
Good place for the soul, the mind and the brain too.

Now I will be back home, in Thailand where we have a King who is really good, who is really extremely loved by the people and who really cares for his people.
The problem in Siam is another though, is the Prime Minister and his “strange” way to run the country.
There are no high ranges there, but wonderful beaches … and over them man is still self destructing, hungry for money and power. What a pity.

I had many good moments here, but the funniest has been once again courtesy of the U.S. Government, when I read that it has expressed its concerns and worries about the lack of human rights and freedom in Nepal.
Why the fuck can`t they just look at their own rotten yard?
Have they never heard of Guantamano?
Have they never visited their ghettos?
Have they already forgotten New Orleans?
Why them fuckers are not able to mind their own business?
Can`t they understand the world does not need them and their opinion?

And may someone please tell me why Americans voted for the dumbest, most dangerous and wicked president possible?

This is really THE GREATEST UNANSWERED QUESTION IN THE HISORY OF MANKIND.

Anyway, PEACE AND LOVE.

Flight Kathmandu – Bangkok, December 3rd, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

ANNAPURNA

2005-12-03T09:58:00.000+07:00

Buddha Air, one name one destiny.
Shaking and dancing little bit over the Himalayan clouds, a Buddha Air plane brings me to Pokhara, nice place indeed.

I must though admit that this trip has seen a rapid and deep decrease of my own personal hygienic standards. Not too many showers and I did practically sleep all this week with the same clothes I was wearing during the day.
And now while I am here sitting in the cold early morning in a Himalayan Hill waiting to see the sunrise over the wonderful Annapurna`s range I fear that tomorrow I will probably be the worst ever smelling passenger ever to have travelled on Thai Airways business class.
Yes you read it right indeed, I will be flying in business class but not because I did become suddenly rich but thanks to my precious Gold Card Member status and the courtesy of the airline which gifted me an upgrade for my birthday.
For sure once I will be in my Bangkok hotel I will spend one hour in a hot bath tub, full of scented soap.

But now I am here, in the cold of this hill. Getting up at 5 a.m. in the morning is not surely my favourite hobby, but today I took a chance hoping the clouds will go elsewhere leaving space to the sun. I woke up and anxiously opened my hotel room`s door and… here are the stars in a very dark but clear sky.
Here we go on top of the hill.

In my younger years I had the chance to do the same thing at Tiger Hill, Darjeeling.
I could have watched the sunrise over the Kanchanjunga but my deeply rooted laziness always had the better over my good intentions literally forcing me to lie under my warm sheets.
Now as I enter the twilight of my existence I realise this is too much of a good chance and I will not let it go.
Here I am raring to go.

And thank God I did, it was just wonderful. Simply breathtaking and no photos in the world will give what I have seen any justice.
All thoughts about the meaning of life disappeared while I was watching this mighty mountain slowly getting enlightened by the first sunrays.
Those mountains have been there for centuries, watching men`s meaningless struggles, men`s dumb fights for power, kingdoms, money and supremacy.
In the meantime how many times did we are born, die, reborn again?
But they always have been there, shadowing the planes, steady, mighty, majestic and powerful.

For a moment I forget about the Tsunami, the rich, the poor, about everything and I just sink into mother nature`s own masterpiece.
I repeat no photo will ever be able to describe the feeling.

At the feet of these mountains men are still fighting, I had to pass through many Nepalese army check posts to reach the top of the hill.
The Maoists are fighting the King and the Government, the King and the Government are fighting the Maoists.
Both claim to be fighting for the people, but I suppose no one ever dreamt to ask the people what the people really want… and I guess the answer would be very simple.
One shall not be a genius to imagine that all they would like is to have the chance to live in peace and to earn enough to eat and survive.

And the Mountain is watching while history is repeating itself all over again.

Poor humans we are, poor creatures we are, so stupid we are.

Pokhara, December 2nd, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

NEPALI GIRLS

2005-12-02T12:35:00.000+07:00

AREN'T THEY SWEET AND BEAUTIFUL?
DOES SOMEONE WANT TO HELP THEM, LOG ON AT www.fondarco.ch AND GET IN TOUCH OR MAIL TO ME.... WE ARE TRYING TO HELP THEM ALL.

AND AS THE BEACH BOYS WERE SINGING....

" I WISH THEY ALL COULD BE NEPALI GIRL"..

PEACE AND LOVE

POKHARA, DEC 2ND 2548

WILD NIGHT IN WARANGAL

2005-11-30T23:07:00.000+07:00

Life is impermanent, how many times I keep repeating it? Too many? Just I feel is good never to forget it.

Here is the proof, yesterday on the train to here I was writing about how is great to be alive and feeling so well, I seemed to be one step away from Nirvana.
Now after a night spent in an Asha Nilayam`s toilet with even nothing to read but lot of stomach pain and diarrhea my view are a wee bit different.

Not that I wish to be dead of course, but today I feel extremely tired and the prospect of a 7 hours long trip back to Hyderabad (via a place called Parkal where there is another project I shall see for future consideration), a late night flight to Delhi and there an hour long trip to the Salesian House where I will sleep in order to save some money, is not so much appealing.
Adding to that I will be travelling with some old Sisters and with due respect Sister are notoriously not the funniest bunch of people.

My stomach this morning seems to have overcome its own Tsunami, but still I am a bit worried to have an emergency crisis while travelling.
While taking a cold bucket shower (again) it came clear to me that having a body means having to suffer.
Is the same concept of having a car and having to pay petrol bills or having a house and paying its mortgage.
Having a body simply means having pain, to suffer and ultimately dying, forgetting this we totally lose the perspective about life and we are in danger of thinking we may be immortal or all mighty powerful.

Of course mine is not absolutely a great pain, but this nuisance that happened tonight just made me think in this way.

In our life we can not escape suffering, pain and death.
Shall this be one more reason enjoy the best of times, to enjoy life when we are given the chance?
I think there is only a possible answer.

So today I will try to make the best out of it, hoping I can get some sleep in the jeep to make up what I did lose tonight. Is gonna be a long day again Khun Phu, just try to make it a good one, because at then it all depends on us how we want our days to be.

Yes, is still great to be alive, even tired, with stomach pain and even with my arsehole burning because of diarrhea.

Then I ventured out, just to say hallo to all children that were waiting outside for me.
Moving slowly like a real Khun Phu, I approached them and here was running towards me, smiling happily Vinay, a small boy whose face is totally deformed. I was simply amazed to realise how these children are keeping giving lessons to me, how unconsciously they really are helping me to keep a right perspective on life.
Me, a man who never liked to be photographed because I always did hate my big nose, always feeling ashamed of my big body now I am looking at Vinay`s devastated but smiling face, I look at all those children whose body is simply a wreck but they keep smiling.
Time for a change Khun Phu? I think it is.

PEACE AND LOVE.

Asha Nilayam, Warangal, November 29th, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

SO FAR SO GOOD

2005-11-30T23:00:00.000+07:00

On the train that today will bring me from Hyderabad to Warangal (site of our Asha Nilayam project) I have once again time to think and to write. It will take me about 4 hours to reach my destination.

Will sleep there and tomorrow early morning travelling on a car back to Hyderabad via Parkkal where I will visit another project.
Finally ending up at Hyderabad airport where I will catch the night flight to Delhi.

So far so good. Lots of miles on my sandals for sure, by car, by air and now by train but also lot of satisfaction, the wonderful feeling of being alive and to share life with other unknown people, so good to feel to be part of that wonderful thing that is the flow of life.

Andhra Rani project was wonderful as usual, bringing me back so many memories and a very much intense and troubled period of my personal life as well.
But in general, our work is proceeding really successfully and, of course this is the most important thing, but once again a travelling experience such as this is jus wonderful.
Making it more interesting is also the fact that I do like to keep this site updated, I like to share my experience out there and also this help me to observe things better, to be much more aware of what I am doing and of what I am seeing.

I feel lack of awareness in our daily routine lead us to frustration and boredom, we are doing things so much automatically, without any perception that sometimes we are not even remembering having them done.
How many times did this happen to me? So many, but being awake, being aware of every moment of my day is making me feel so much alive and well.

And let me tell you… is great to be alive… I do not know for how long I will be walking on this earth but I really want to taste every moment of it.

Golgonda Express train to Warangal, November 28th, 2548
C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

BLOGGING

2005-11-30T22:53:00.000+07:00

After a very nice evening in Madurai`s “Supreme Hotel”, with the good company of some very good friends (Salesians fathers), few beer bottles and a “Masala Dosa”, this morning I`ve been rudely awaken at 5.30 by my alarm clock.
A cold bucket shower (and here is the age starting to show, I swear I longed for a hot bath tub), a quick south Indian coffee and I am on my way to Madurai airport.

Now I am sitting in Channai Airport`s restaurant airport, waiting for my connecting flight to Hyderabad. I have still to wait 5 hours. Today is just a transfer day as I will reach our Andhra Rani Project just in the evening. So I have time to prepare my reports and relax a bit, and maybe to play my FIFA MANAGER 06 and try to lead Celtic to his 4th SPL Championship in a row.

Once in Hyderbad I will be too much busy again, train to Warangal, back to Hyderbad, flight to Delhi and finally flight to Kathmandu.

I feel extremely well, totally satisfied of what I have seen in our Tsunami projects. Work is going on. We are effectively helping the people, this makes me feel really happy and in great mood.
Of course great credit goes to those who daily work on the field, but still I feel we are like a community whose work is reaching its targets.
And that is good, very very good.
This satisfaction is mitigating the tiredness that is starting to creep in this old Khun Phu`s body.

Feeling totally relaxed and comfortable I have just time to wonder about one small thing.
And the thing is… why I am writing this? Why I keep publishing this blog, filling these pages with words, feelings and ideas? Who on earth is gonna visit the blog and read its contents?

First answer that spring in my poor and tired mind is:
This is just a kind of message in a bottle, out there in the huge sea of internet.
Maybe someday, someone, somewhere will pick up this bottle and read its message.
Maybe someday, somewhere, someone may share my views and something may start, life other than impermanent is also very much unpredictable.
And, after all one of the beautiful aspects of life is sharing, isn`t it?

Second and even more important:
I am writing for myself, because I just like it and this shall be a good reason enough for me to do it. Not always we have to do things for the others.
If one day I could share my ideas with someone I will be really happy but then… already I`m happy and satisfied like this so ...

PEACE AND LOVE TO EVERYBODY

Chennai Airport, November 27th, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

DEMOCRACY, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

2005-11-30T10:18:00.000+07:00

Therespuram, Tamil Nadu, South of India:

Wow, shall be nice to be a rock star. Today I had a glimpse of it when, in a packed room, hundreds of kids and their mothers started greeting and clapping at me.
Wow, it was gorgeous, I was the star. Me, the formerly low esteem man finally had his moment of glory.
Just kidding, of course.
But I really thought how rock stars must feel when they are having thousands of young people screaming at their feet. Shall be exciting, isn`n it? Having so much power on so many people, must be like a drug or something, illusion at its maximum stage.

But my moment of glory just vanished when I got closer to these women and I listened to them, their stories, their problems and their agony.
Here are some of such stories, all real and tremendously true, stories directly coming from a fishermen slum called Therespuram, Tamil Nadu.

MARIA MONICA, her father was a fisherman who got burned when a stove caught fire in the boat. He is now unable to work, the family has no food and debts for about 15.000 rupees

MADATHI; her mother is deaf and dumb, his father lost his boat and got injured during a storm when he was out on the sea. In losing the boat he lost everything he had, except the debt which amounts of 40.000 rupees. (The was made to buy the boat he lost).

MARIA PRASANTH: his father went away with another woman. He has two brothers one of them is selling fish to help the family to survive but is not enough. They are literally starving, debts made by the father before he went away are Rs 20.000

KALAYARASI: she has a heart disease and need operation. Her mother came to me in tears asking for help. They need Rs 25.000 for the surgery. Father is a cook and earning very little, they already have Rs 10.000 debts.

MURGESHWARI, a handicapped girl, her mother died and now she lives with the grand-mother. Her father remarried and left her and the brother behind without caring. She is severely sick, grand mother she has no money to even have her visited by a doctor.

NANDHINI is a small beautiful girl with a heart disease. She will be needing injections until she will be 18 years old. She belongs to a very poor family, and she has 3 sisters and 1 brother. Father is a fisherman but is not earning enough to provide the medicines for his little one.

And at the end of the day I met with the “Widows group”, part of the “Poor People`s Bank Project” that we just did launch I the hope to ease those women`s problems.
Their tales of sorrow and pain are really heartbreaking.
Many of them did not eat for the last 4 days, they have no work because of the bad weather.
They all worked as labour in the fishing processing companies. Because of bad weather for the last 4 days no boat went to the sea, thus no catch and no work for them.
When they work they earn 1 rupee for every single Kg of fish they clean, maximum quantity they can clean in one day is 15 kg. So they are earning only 15 rupees a day.
They have average debts from 10.000 to 30.000 rupees, all of them, young and old have children and… they are desperate.

Shall I go on?
And now I can`t help thinking about some people, some very famous people who are shamelessly paid an absurd amount of money for what then?
To play football, basketball, golf, to sing, act or I think about the money wasted on war (ring some bell Mr. Bush) to export democracy.
What the fuck is democracy?
Democracy is there only for the rich people, what kind of democracy can be existing in this world when so many resources are wasted for simply nothing, while children, women, men and whole families are starving, dying and could be easily saved?

How can a system allow that sportsmen, artists, models, stylists and so many others could be paid such an awful amount of money, just to perform whatever they do?
Of course is not those individuals` mistake, they have been given those wages by the industry, by the power, by a wicked system which is using them to hypnotise the masses.
The problem lies in this system that pays them so much, in a system that promotes this model, where money and success, success and money only matter.
So I say fuck the system, I hate a system which only benefits very few rich people and deprives so many desperate and poor ones.
Fuck a system that allows famine in Africa, fuck a system that allows child trafficking, fuck a system which does not care about its poor, underprivileged masses.

Acceptance; Buddha talks about acceptance but this is really too much, seeing tears falling down from those mothers who have no food for their kids, who have not enough money to buy them medicines, who have to go to the loan sharks to get few rupees to survive and then have to struggle all life just to pay the interests?
Still I can not accept that, still anger soars inside me when I see all this injustice in the world.
This is something I can not accept, I may be far away from Nirvana (indeed I am) but still I can not turn a blind eye on this. All those tears could easily be dried with next to nothing but they keep falling from those poor women`s eyes, forever.

These people at Therespuram, will have a Tsunami to face everyday of their life.
TV cameras are now away their wonderful beaches, news people are looking elsewhere but reality still bites, here reality is poverty, hunger and death.
I feel so much powerless, frustrated and angry.

Fuck a system where money is all that matters, where a man could waste millions in buying a football team, where money is wasted in useless F1 cars, in movies, in wars, where even these people`s own corrupted governments are neglecting them..

Therespuram, November 26th, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

TSUNAMISED

2005-11-27T14:50:00.000+07:00

After a night in Bangalore, two in Changanacherry here I am in Kanyakumari for another single night, next one will be in Tuticorin and the next again will be in Madurai. I realise I will never sleep more than one night in the same place until I will be back in Bangkok, not bad for an old Khun Phu.

I am here to visit the Tsunami affected areas of South Tamil Nadu. It has been nearly one year since the killer wave struck these shores and since my first visit here.

It is surely been an eventful year, we did lot of work for fund raising, three visits on the spot and a countless e-mails and phone calls with the ones in charge of the relief works.
It was worth, the have been able to overcome lot of problems, it surely hasn`t been easy but here I am, and allow me to feel proud of our work, proud to have been able to keep our promises and to have done our part in this tragedy`s relief.

Of course we are not the only ones who did our job right, so many other good people did their part too in trying to bring care and relief to those thousands of people all over South East Asia who have been so much affected by the seaquake. And this was really a great thing, all people being mobilised with a real positive energy to help the others.
It was great being involved in this and I may be selfish but I have to admit I feel really proud to have part of this positive energy wave, I can say: “I was there and I did my wee part in helping those victims”, and it makes me feel well.
Unfortunately, is also true that thanks to the Tsunami lot of people got shamelessly rich.
They stole, tricked and cheated the poor affected people, took the money that was meant to be for the victims and ran away. These are every day stories, like vultures those men blatantly misused the funds meant to be for whose who were in real and urgent need. Shame on them, really.

For our part we`ve built a big Water Tank (a God`s sent blessing in local people words) and here I am in Keela Manakudy distributing the fishing boats we did promise six months ago. It took longer than expected because we faced really unexpected problems but we did not back out and we did our duty.
Not a single penny was lost and every single donation we did receive is now in those floating pieces of wood.

I am happy, let me feel this way, I am happy to see those faces smiling, those faces whose eyes have seen death, misery, hunger and cheaters finally have something to cheer. Their shy way to give me a “namaste”, their shy smile which barely has teeth, with the eyes nearly closed as they would be afraid to make contact with mine, is a big reward for myself.
A reward that I do not even deserve because all this has been possible thank to the hundreds of people who donated money to help other human beings in a distant and far away part of the world.

Now back in the car and on the way to Tuticorin, where I will meet other poor people and children affected by the Tsunami, but not only by that.
They are affected and crushed by the loan sharks and by the rich people`s exploitation, never any change in the history of man kind, right?

Kanyakumari, November 25th, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

ILLUSION AND DUST

2005-11-27T14:42:00.000+07:00

I know it may sound like a stereotyped social-worker/third world activist bullshit but being here, among all those poor crippled children, among severely hit C.P. patients really gives me food for thought.

What the fuck is life?
Is it the whores in Sukhmvit Road?
Or it is those children who can not even walk, they can just crawl their way into life?
Is this the Ying and the Yang?
Is not the first time I see those poor kids, I do not even remember how many times I did visit them but maybe coming straight from “Bangkok never ending party atmosphere” to here is like a punch in the stomach.

I watch those girls, Jinumol, Gilu, Sujatha etc. and I think about their lives, how they must be feeling inside.
I wonder what they hide behind their wonderful smile that, for an old cynical fart like me, can not be real. Life has been too much cruel for them to allow them to smile like in such a way.
I think about so many people I know in Switzerland who are unable to put on a smile even if paid 1.000 Francs.

Life is not fair, this is sure.
Why were they born like this? If there is a God, I wonder why does it allow this to happen?
Is this only a matter of bad Karma?

Fuck shit, I have no clue of course, but here I am among those smiling children who basically have nothing to cheer about their life and I admire them so much.
I will never know what their smile is hiding, I can only imagine what kind of pain and sorrow they are having inside, but at least they are putting on a brave face against the shit life gave them… at least they do… how many among us would be able to, at least, do that?

I can not do too much for them, unless what I am doing now and shall this make me feel better?
Nope, I know what I am doing for them is next to nothing, I wish I could do more but maybe this is simply their fate, life is about acceptance as Buddha said and one thing is sure we can not go against life, we can just follow the flow, we have no control about anything. Life is impermanent.

I see them gracefully dancing and I wonder “are they dancing for life or are they dancing despite life?”, but who cares at the end. I watch them dance, moving around with their “dead legs” and hope this moment will make them feel happy… despite everything.

PALAI, HOME FOR OLD PEOPLE:

If in Bangkok temptation was constantly staring me in the eyes here in Palai death is doing the same thing.
I look at those poor old people in here, they are practically just waiting to die.
I saw their old faces marked by time, pain and sorrow, I look at their crippled bodies and I think that this is what is going to happen to everyone of us.
Beauty, strength, stamina everything will disappear one day and death will uncover what we are really are…illusion and dust.

Changanacherry, November 23rd, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

THE GREATEST UNANSWERED QUESTIONS IN THE HISTORY OF MAN KIND!

2005-11-24T14:45:00.000+07:00

Why are all Kerala men (and unfortunately few women too) bearing big moustaches?
Are Kerala babies born already provided with big moustaches?

Not even science could come up with an appropriate answer to this question.

During a 4 hours long jeep trip to Cochin airport to Changanacherry I did count thousands of men on the road and every single one of them was having a moustache on his face, some had black, grey for the older men but everyone of them was having hair on his face (and I repeat unfortunately also some women too).

Why?

BANGALORE NIGHT

2005-11-24T14:41:00.000+07:00

Here am I, at Bangalore airport waiting to fly to Cochin, Kerala, Mercy Home Project, the first of the many I will visit in the next two weeks.

I had a decent night after all, being probably tired surely helped me to sleep a bit in that Hotel`s bed full of stains (and so was the pillow as well) and with no blankets.

In the morning could not take a shower as the water pipe was not working and the same applied to the toilet flush, not what you call 5 stars hotel I suppose. Thank God I was not suffering of diarrhea.

Is raining here and the weather is rather chilly, this time on the way back to the airport I did pay just 50 rupees as there was less traffic than last night.
This means the guys at the airport are really natural born cheaters, I suppose once they see a white skinned guy they increase automatically the price of about 100%.

Now I am sitting in one of the few tables available at the airport, in a “Coffee day” coffee shop.
At the same table, in front of me a young guy is eating something like a veggie burger, I can see practically everything that is in his mouth as he can`t seem to be able to keep it shut while chewing. He is chewing his food with some happiness I do believe and, unfortunately for me, I can see all the ingredients that were once in the burger and now are smashed in his mouth.

Now the young man is gone and another one, older, is setting in front of me.
Believe it or not this one is emptying his suitcase on the table where I have my coffee and computer. T-Shirts, pants and I pray to God he will not take out his used underwear at least.

Welcome back to India, Khun Phu..

Bangalore, November 22nd, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

KHUN PHU GOES TO INDIA, AGAIN

2005-11-24T14:30:00.000+07:00

10 p.m. local time, flight TG 325 is about to land in Bangalore. I am back in India for the umpteenth time.
Stunningly enough I go quickly through the usually long process of immigration and custom, I collect my suitcase just to find myself out of the airport and start fighting with taxi drivers and auto-rickshaw drivers who want to charge 200 rupees to reach the hotel in the city.

Finally I find an auto driver who tells me the sweet words “meter sir” that sound like celestial music to my tired ears.

So after few minutes I am caught myself in the middle of Bangalore night traffic, the gas smell already deep inside my lungs and on my clothes.
Finally I reach the “so-called” Hotel and the meter says 60 rupees, I give 100 to the driver telling him “honesty always pays off, that`s the karma law”, he smiles at me and goes away happy I suppose.

My God, going from Bangkok to Bangalore is like first swimming in a beautiful tropical beach and then in some kind of polluted cold lake.
The hotel is lousy, totally. I am paying 1.000 rupees for a dirty and mosquito infested room. A/C is supposed to be there but is not working.
Better not mention the bathroom and its smell. I am simply very happy to have taken the soap from the “Park Hotel” in Bangkok, since here is obviously missing.

I venture out, the streets of the city are nearly desert, just few men wandering around apparently without goal, where are the ladies? Where are the girls?
And obviously I am the only “falang” in the area, even though here they would not call me in such way.

If in Bangkok temptation is constantly staring you in the eyes 24 hours a day here it seems that even if you search for it you would not find it.
At least I think so until an auto rickshaw offer to bring me in some untold place where I could find very beautiful and naked Indian women. This is India where everything is hidden, where (according to many people) there is no prostitution, no aids and no gays. Welcome to “denial country”.

Missing Bangkok? You must be kidding me, I miss so much Thailand, Bangkok and Surin but as we all know life is impermanent so here I am, with a job to do and tomorrow is another day.

Anyway I go on walking a bit, the smell of urine in not really a pleasant fellow, I saw few men pissing on the sidewalks, but I also notice few small malls, probably an attempt to modernity. I end up in a mysteriously still open “Coffee world” where I am writing these words on a piece of waste paper drinking so distant cousin to a cappuccino.
How I miss “Swenssen`s” and its beautiful waitresses.
Of course I am the only customer in the bar.

Good night.

Bangalore, November 21, 2548

C – Copyright CLAUDIO ROMANO

FLYING AWAY

2005-11-22T08:09:00.000+07:00

I am about to leave Thailand once more, this time I will be flying toward the Indian subcontinent where I will visit India and, after a gap of 15 years, Nepal.

As I sit very comfortably in the THAI Airways V.I.P. Lounge (courtesy of my frequent flyer Gold Card Member holder) where I can enjoy free drinks and snacks I cannot help but think that this may be my last flight, my last beer, this may well be the last time I did speak to my kids and to my wife.

I am not afraid and I am not being pessimistic but is a fact that living in Thailand got me much closer to life and to death as well, got me much closer to the meaning of “impermanence of life” as in Buddha`s teachings. Is a simple and sure fact that every day, every normal routine day could be our last one but we often forgot that and so we also forget to try to make our best of our days.

I am just realistic, as I sit in this very comfortable chair and I think very quickly about my life. How lucky I have been so far (even with all the mistakes I`ve done), I am so lucky because I have the chance to love everyday some wonderful people and to receive love from them.
I may not be the wealthiest man on earth but this fact surely makes me one of the richest.

Will this be my last flight?
Or tomorrow will I reach Kerala and start my work with those poor unlucky, handicapped children from our Projects?

Well, if someone may be interested in that… just open the blog in the next few days and you will get the answer.
Take care

KHUN PHU GOES TO BANGKOK

2005-11-21T01:47:00.000+07:00

One month ago Khun Phu went to Pattaya and got confused, extremely confused.
Then after some soul searching he thought to have cleared a bit of his confusion… he thought so, at least.

And now, in these days Khun Phu is in Krung Thep and, once again, he is a very confused Khun Phu and for the very same reasons as in Pattaya
This simply means his soul searching was surely not good enough.

Let’s proceed step by step, Pen Youm Youm as we say in Thailand.

1) Pattaya:

The brothel city of Thailand, a town that lives and prosper entirely and only on the sex business.
I travelled there with my wife to meet someone so please do not have any bad thinking.
We reached the city at about 4 a.m. and it was as crowded and busy as any Swiss city on Christmas Eve, I could not believe my eyes.
There were two main animals races around; young, tiny and, mostly, beautiful girls and old, fat, and mostly ugly men (of course Falang).
In those early morning hours I did discover with horror that still I am an extremely judgemental man, I did realise that my belief of having erased those old patterns after 2 years of Asia and a rather serious approach to Buddhism was just… another illusion.

It did scare me a lot do discover that still I was having inside myself all those rooted deeply Catholic concepts such as sin, sinner, guilt and so on.

It took a good breakfast, discussing the matter with my wife and observing all those old men happily chatting with their young friends to overcome those feelings.
At the end of the breakfast I understood that I shall accept life as it comes, that everyone has the right to have fun in his own way and that basically my judgement just mean that I unconsciously think to be better than the others… which is totally not true I assure you, as I am surely no better than anyone.

So I left Pattaya feeling much better and, surprisingly for me, even liking the place.

2) Bangkok:

I am in the capital city waiting for my passport and tickets for India and Nepal.
My wife is unfortunately sick so this time I am here all alone.
Is actually the first time I am going around Thailand alone and, honestly, in the beginning I was really feeling like a poor Issarn farmer for the first time in the big city.
Then once I started going around easily I really enjoyed being here.
Actually I love Bangkok and actually I hate Bangkok and for the same reasons… too much traffic, too many people, too much noise… but is alive, for a man grown up in a small village in Switzerland and now living in a rural village of Issarn, sometimes is good to see life pulsating at his best and at his worst.
Bangkok is just like life, it there is some very good things and some very bad ones.

But my old ghosts came back again one evening while I was quietly drinking a Guinness in a bar where a group of young Thai was playing loud rock music covers from Green Day, Simple Plan, Santana, RHCP to Cranberries.
I did fall again in the judgement trap when I saw some men well past their 40`s acting like dumb teenagers, dancing totally out of tune in front of some drunken young girls.
I found myself once again pointing my fingers at those men, without even knowing their stories and, maybe, their sorrows just judging them from what I could see on the surface.

Surely a funny and interesting thing was that the few young men in the bar (me included ah ah ah) were sitting quietly chatting and absolutely not being interested in doing the fools like their potential fathers were doing.

Again I felt really confuse, lot of question sprang in my mind such the meaning of dignity, self respect, respect to other people and who has the right to define everyone’s behaviour.

While sipping my beer I then decided to put a definitive stop to all those kind of useless and presumptuous thoughts:
After all “Who the fuck am I to judge and to question other people’s behaviour, let them enjoy their life as they like, let them have their “Sanook””?.

So I started enjoying even more my beer having fun watching those men dancing with less grace and posture than any elephant in the Surin’s Yearly festival.

I did just allow myself one more thought on the way back to the hotel, walking the narrow sidewalks of Sukhmvit Road, full of food stalls and people sitting on the ground selling everything possible and more.

I could not help but watching all those odd couples I was passing by, walking hand in hand like long time sweet hearts. Honestly I was not judging anymore but it was like my eyes were seeing a different image.

It was like the girl was actually walking holding the man’s dick in her hand, like a collar to a dog. I could figure out how she was actually dominating him, turning him into submission and exploiting his too obvious weakness.
Well, I like to think in such a way as some kind of revenge for those girls who may have been forced into prostitution by poverty or other forces but not for their own will.
Holding those old men’s dick, squeezing money out of them is probably their only way, their only weapon of revenge towards a world, towards a society who did turn them into just “meat for grabs”.

So let it be, let them fool all those falangs, let this be some kind of justice for them. They will probably not be able to escape their fate but at least they will sink with their oppressor.

Am I being judgemental again? Nope, this is just my opinion.

Krung Thep, November 20, 2548

C – COPYRIGHT / Claudio Romano

KHUN PHU

2005-11-19T00:54:00.001+07:00

I suppose that the thousands and thousands of regular visitors of this „blog“ may wonder... “What the fuck does Khun Phu means?”.

Well, Khun Phu is simply what in Thai language is for Grand Father.
In fact yours truly is the proud GF of 2 wonderful babies ”Wee Liam” and “Sarah the Princess”.

Surely those of you who have the so-called “Sixth Sense” may have understood that before being GF I have been a father as well (and still I am) and of course I am so much proud of my kids and full of love for them. I can not put their photos in the blog as they are too many and I am afraid they may fill completely the memory space, but I assure you they are all so beautiful.

Note: to all young ladies in the audience, please do not be disappointed, I may be a Grand Father but still a young one, surely one of the youngest and fittest available.
The real problem is that I have been drafted again and it seems that there is no “buy out” clause in my contract. Sorry lasses.

WOULDN’T IT BE NICE?

2005-11-15T15:13:00.000+07:00

In a few minutes I shall be landing at Don Muang Airport, Bangkok. Safety belt already tied, smiling and beautiful air hostesses are kindly collecting my headphones and putting my seat in the upright position according to the rules.
Once again I am back in Thailand, surely happy about it but after three weeks of Europe, after reading for 21 days news about the deadly avian flu that is about to spread all over the world, but mainly in South East Asia I start to feel extremely worried and anxious.
I do imagine after passing through immigration and custom to find myself outside the airport, on the streets of Krung Thep and seeing its sidewalks covered by a huge quantities of rotten dead bodies of humans and chickens. I imagine the few survivors walking like zombies after such huge devastation.
I am getting ready, “nueng, sawng, sahm” and here I am outside the airport and… to my big surprise everything seem to be normal. What happened?Maybe Bangkok authorities they did like their colleagues of Calcutta when some Pope went and visit the city: they hid the dirt, the rubbish and the poor people on the back streets!
Too good to be true anyway, I greet my friend Pe Daeng with a “Wai” and take my “Pusao” (a very old second hand Toyota) and start my road trip to the guts of interior Issarn, Ban Naudom, Rattana Buri, Surin.
And then I do realize one thing. How stupid I am, there are no chicken in Bangkok, the only ones are those fried by the lousy KFF. So I will have my vision of doom once I will enter the country side of Thailand, the rice belt of the Northeast.
I reach Saraburi and again everything is normal, but wait… Saraburi is not yet in Issarn so I told to myself to drive confidently until Korat, then I will start my journey to the “Bird flu Hell”.
Once again to my huge surprise nothing seems to be wrong in Korat and the same in Buri Ram and finally in Surin, Rattana Buri and Ban Naudom.
Oh, here I understand, the miracle of Tamiflu has probably reached those places and saved thousands of people. So I ask my wife and she doesn’t know a fuck about the miracle drug and very little about the Pandemic that is hanging on our very civilized world.
Here people are too busy harvesting rice, on which depends their livelihood to worry about something that is just on the papers and on the news. They are so lucky to live so far away of the media domination, as it seems that in the West all people who lives in front of the TV are getting ready for the imminent Armageddon!The evil power of the media hit again! People are once again scared thus so easy to manipulate and to be kept quiet. After the terrorist, SARS and many other things thanks God we have now the bird flu to fill our pages and to scare people, isn’t it?
Over there in Europe it seems there is no more Tamiflu available, people did rush to buy it at such a ridiculous high price and with no guarantee that it may be even effective. I suppose it was a really very good job by Roche PR people!
Anyway it seems that now all pharmaceutical companies are searching for a vaccine for this new virus.That’s is good but let me just wonder … how many people died so far of “Bird flu”?100, 200, 500 or 1.000 ?
Honestly I do not know, but let me ask you then…. How many people has George W. Bush killed? Many more I think, so why not try to produce and anti GWB vaccine?
And how many people has Osama Bin Laden killed? Many more I think, so why not try to produce and anti OBL vaccine? Or maybe the above GWB is attempting that in killing thousands of poor Iraqi people?
And how many people have Pol Pot and his Khmer Rouges killed? Many more I think , so why not try to produce and anti PP vaccine?
And how many people has religion killed? Call it “Crusade”, “Inquisition” or “Jihad” is the same fucking shit. So why not produce an anti Religion vaccine?
And finally how many humans have been killed by fellow humans being them Americans, Japanese, Germans, Chinese, whites, reds, yellows, blacks, blues, greens, purple or whatever! And how many innocent animals have been mercilessly killed by humans?
So for the sake of humanity and for our future generations why not try to prepare an anti human vaccine that can kill all really dangerous and deadly human viruses such as greed, selfishness, violence, bigotry and fundamentalism among many others?
As the Beach Boys were singing, wouldn’t it be nice?

And what about our darling chicken friends?Well poor birds, they are nothing else than, once again, victim of human madness and greed. Have you ever heard for “Factory farm” where those poor birds have to live for the sake of productivity and humans’ gain?Those environment, surely not their natural one, where they live in cramped, heated, airless sheds is a really breeding ground for any viruses.
That's what they call the "Karma Law" isn't it?
Blame the chicken? Nope, blame once again the so called “most intelligent” of animals, the “Son of God” according to the Christians. Wow, me I know I have not been a very good father for sure, but at least my daughters and son are way better than those of God, not bad after all, isn’t it?
Ban Naudom, November 15th, 2548
COPYRIGHT C – Claudio Romano